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Introducing….. Fatty McSlim

So, here comes another blog about being fat, trying to lose weight, loving cakes, never fitting into a size 8, bla bla bla!  It’s a hot topic with many different views, but on this blog, you’ll only hear mine, my struggle with being fat, pretending I am fine about it and living in a world where some (although a minority) celebrate it and most are disgusted.

Welcome to my world, the world of Fatty McSlim

 

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The fight for the right to sparkle ✨✨

“Boys can wear pink too”

“Don’t call girls pretty”

“Why is there an astronaught on the boys t shirt?”

This is what I see daily on tv, in newspapers, online and in horrified complaints to large chain stores. 

***warning this blog is likely to be seen as controversial so read with caution***

I always rebelled, I was strong and challenged rules and loved climbing trees not just playing with barbies. 

On Christmas Day I played with my brothers drum set and he played with my dollhouse. 

I hated authority, I got straights A’s at school, I challenged the norm and guess what?? I also wear pink ALL the time, I love it if I’m called pretty and leave a trail of bloody shiny glitter where ever I go. 

I had t shirts that said pretty princess and I kicked ass as a girl child and still do as an adult woman. A lack of t shirts with ‘girls lead’ or ‘be an astronaught’ hasn’t stopped me being the strong successful woman I am.

Yes we get paid less and the glass ceiling still exists but having the sign ‘boys clothes’ removed from the children’s shop or giving me a truck for my birthday instead of the pink my little pony wouldn’t have changed that.

I get the sentiment behind it in terms of stereotypes and perception of the sexes but come on it’s going too far. 

My point – please stop it with all this gender neautral fights! Now before I’m crucified for this I am not wading into any gender association debate or challenging anyone who feels they are born in the wrong body.

This post is not about that. This post is about letting me be a pink, girly, glitter filled woman if I want!! It doesn’t hinder my ability to be amazing. 

We are in danger of telling girls they can only be successful if they drop the pink frills and that boys must wear some glitter so they understand their feminine side.

I’m all for being who you want to be so don’t take that away from kids just so we look like we are addressing equality. It contradicts. 

I’m now off to sit on my pink velvet throne, drink tea from my flowery teacup, while wearing a t shirt saying ‘princess’ and plotting to rule the world 💋💋

👸🏼 Princesses do rule wether they wear pink or not 💗

Plus Size Blogger

The most mortifying moment of my life…….

There is no fancy title, no quirky message and no flowering up.

On my way home from Majorca at 1.10pm on Friday 18th August 2017, I had to ask the air hostess for a seatbelt extender. 

The most mortifying moment of my life and something I NEVER thought would be me. 

I haven’t blogged for a while and here I was poised to share my holiday outfits, brimming with body positivity as I wore a skirt and crop top one night. Ready to share my confident stories of bikini wearing and laugh at how not one but two! of my dresses burst as I tried to put them on. I was even ready to tell you about moving into my new flat, which is 4 flights of stairs up, and giggle at how I fell just before the top due to utter exhaustion and gave myself horrendous bruises. 

Today there are no laughs. I’ve taken ‘body positivity’ and masked a real concern. I’m getting bigger and bigger. Bursting clothes, falling because of being unfit and asking for that bloody extender are not funny. Not to me and not to my long suffering body. 

My mask has slipped. In fact it’s well and truly fallen off. I’m horrified at myself. 

I’ve no idea what my next steps are. I can’t bare to rejoin another weight loss class I’ll end up obsessed with or join a gym I’ll never attend. I’m even scared to try running again, something I loved but will feel upset when I realise I’ve lost my fitness and won’t be able to run more than a minute. Back to square one, having undone months of hard work. 

I know myself this is quite a sad post and not my usual laughs and jokes. However this is not a time for laughs or masking the fact that I’m severely overweight.

I’m given lovely comments all the time and I appreciate them but no amount of bleach, Botox, clothing or eyelash extensions can hide my pending health issues if I don’t change my life asap. 

Fatty McSlim needs her life overhauled and has no idea where to start……

Plus Size Blogger

Surround yourself with pretty dresses and good vibes 💋💋


This could be used as a ‘before’ and ‘after’ shot for the latest diet fad don’t you think? They were taken 2 hours apart with no photoshop what so ever! 

Good camera angles and posing does wonders 😂😂

I had my leaving night on Friday and I’m still hungover so my writing skills have gone to pot!! In the spirit of before and afters, if you’ve ever joined a slimming club this will give you a laugh 💋💋

1. You will wear exactly the same thing to get weighed each week. Even if it’s -2 degrees outside you’ll be wearing a floaty summer dress and freezing your tits off.
2. You’ve considered weighing in wearing just a swimming costume.
3. There’s always a Janet in the group who takes 42 cruises a year.
4. You’ll save all your Syns/Points up in the week so you can neck a bottle of vodka on Friday night.
5. There’s always a Pauline in group who ate 8 sausage rolls at her cousin’s funeral and put on 5 pounds in a week.
6. You will not eat a thing before weigh in. Even if weigh in is at 8pm.
7. You’ll praise a Susan who maintained.
8. Food on the diet a bit dry? Quark. Need a creamy hit in your pasta? Quark. Broken leg? Quark. End world poverty? Quark.
9. Group leader: “You can eat a whole bag of pasta if you need to…..but you won’t be able to” You: “I beg to fucking differ Linda”.
11. There will always be one lone man called Peter in group who loses 9 pounds each week. He seems like a lovely chap but you’ll all secretly hate the bastard.
12. You will be unable to poo before you get weighed. As soon as you get home….massive shit.
13. The group leader will try to tell you that potatoes cut into strips and sprayed in Fry Light are “better than chip shop chips”. This is bullshit Linda. Bullshit.
14. A new flavour of Müller Light is announced and it creates a frenzy of riot proportions.
15. Linda is no skinny cow herself and doesn’t follow the plan.

16. Syns/Points don’t count if it’s to help cure a hangover. They also don’t count if you’re eating them off another person’s plate.
(Credit Bad Momma)
If all else fails, surround yourself with pretty dresses and good vibes ❤️

Plus Size Blogger

The clash; gingham vs leopard print – my biggest worry 

May all your pain be champagne 🥂

I love this saying.  Simple and also includes my favorite ever drink.

Today’s blog has been inspired by my worries this week.  I sat on the bus looking at a young girl in here early 20’s with envy of her youth.  I constantly forget my glasses and as a result I screw my face up all the time and the lines that show depress me.  I haven’t had a botox top up in months and it shows – well to me anyway.

I had a flick through Facebook and there is many posts supporting London Pride and celebrating Germany’s decision to allow same sex marriage.

As I walk to work I see people of many colours and religions some more prominent by the way they dress and I think of the hate Muslims in particular are getting just now and closer to home the backlash the catholic church are getting for the perceived archaic beliefs amongst other things.  

Then there is me and a huge community of ‘fatties’ who promote body positivity and loving yourself no matter what size.  Fighting for the right to be you.

Age, weight, sex, religion, sexuality bla bla bla

Now I’m not being trivial about any characteristic but it struck me how crazy, to me, that each group are fighting for the right to be them.  To not be discriminated against and to be allowed to be them.

I 100% get that worrying that I look older than a 20 year old bares no comparison to being persecuted for your religion or sexuality, however the point I am trying to make is how banal and alien it is to hate/berate/challenge someone for their right to be them.

If you are a good person and live your life with kindness why does it matter what age you are, sex you are, who you love or what god you worship – such a simple word – ‘equality’ – yet such a difficult thing to achieve.  I am not wading into a debate about recent terrorist attacks or views on particular religions, this isn’t what my post is about.  If you live a kind heart life with no harm to others, you should be able to live in peace.

We are so judgmental as a society. to others and sadly to ourselves.

My only real worry this week was whether my red and white gingham shoes plus my leopard print rain jacket matched.  I really do live a privileged life.

As you can see below, it works…….. kind of 😛

I recently seen a quote from Kris Degioia, who I had never heard of but using old faithful Google, found she runs her own company that provides software to find and stop cyber bullying.  I believe this was triggered by a cyber bullying she herself was a target for.  She seems to be a very self assured woman who takes no prisoners and celebrates just being her.

I loved her her quote;

‘stop hating yourself for everything you aren’t and start loving yourself for everything you already are.’

How apt is this based on last weeks blog and my letter to my teenage self?

 

If you take one thing from today’s blog take this – Be your own kind of beautiful 💋

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A Letter to my 14/15 year old self in 1996 👩🏻‍🎓

“Is fat really the worst thing a human can be? Worse than vindictive, jealous, shallow, vain, boring or cruel?”

Dear Louise 

JK Rowling, she’s an author who writes and publishes, in 1997, the first book in her Harry Potter series (which as a book worm and magic filled heart, you’ll love) is quoted saying this in 2006. I wish you could read this now at 14. After years of body loathing, would it make a difference? Probably not with your strong willed, defiant mindset. However I’d like to have seen your reaction if you had read it?

Teenage years are a difficult period to have body confidence. Vanity, looks, appearance and your ‘brand’ are so important. You have a brain, a good one and you don’t see how much of a gift this is. Your mum is pushing you to stay part of the maths challenge group you think is geeky, embarassing and takes up your lunch breaks. Your dad is encouraging you to remove the beauty qualifications you are desperate to do from your head and go to university in another country. He wants you to travel the world and take every opportunity you are given. 

At the moment you see them as blocking your dreams but all they are trying to do is ensure you actually live them using gifts you’ve been so luckily given. 

I wonder how your face looks now reading this letter. In fact I know. Your eyes will roll and you’ll be determined to prove me wrong even if in your heart of hearts you know I’m right. You hate being dependant on anyone so taking advice is a last, if ever resort for you.

In a few short paragraphs I’ve shown you who you are – intelligent, determined, self reliant with a great imagination yet all you see is the body you hate. 

You are about to embark on the first journey of teenage romance as well as prepare for your higher exams. You’ve just quit dancing which your teacher and mum saw coming and are hopeful it’s a phase.  It’s not and you’ll regret this in 10-15 years but by telling you this I’m likely pushing you further away from the idea.

Who knows if by staying a dancer you’d have a better relationship with your body as you’d value fitness and nutrition or if, caught up in that world, you’d be constantly comparing yourself to other dancers body’s and be worse than you are now? 

Your self loathing is causing you to be jealous and moody. You aren’t appreciating the amazing things you have.

I promise you happiness isn’t size specific. You won’t suddenly lose that moody streak if you lose 2 stones. At 9 or 10 stones you don’t have 2 stones to lose. Don’t start that weight watchers class, if you ignore everything else please listen to this. If you join it begins your journey of yo yo dieting and your mental health will suffer badly. 

Every girl in your class is going through the same body confidence worries. Even if you think they are so thin and you are so fat, they will hate that their boobs haven’t grown like yours, they will hate that you somehow missed the spotty phase and have glowing skin and likely most of all they hate their permed damaged, bleached hair and constantly dream of the waist length shiny dark hair you have and don’t notice. 

There is no one perfect girl in that school. There is no one perfect girl anywhere, they don’t exist. We all have flaws. 

The next few years will be the best and worst of your life. In teenage terms. You’ll find this patronising but as I’m your older self and although I’ve matured slightly I still have that same determined streak so I will tell you anyway! 

I don’t want you to change anything or live with regrets but a few tweaks would do;

1) try and do everything with kindness, realise the world doesn’t owe you anything 

2) stay in the maths challenge, your good at it and it will give you so many more opportunities. It’s geeky but geeky is cool….. honestly 🤓

3) your stomach is not fat, like seriously!! But even if it was, it doesn’t define you. Your intelligence, friendships and your crazy sense of humour do. Focus on these. Make these your brand!

3) a smarmy red head is about to turn your world upside down. He’s not amazing and your world won’t collapse without him. Don’t erase this part from your life, just make sure you punch his face in rather than cry when it all ends 😂😂. I promise it will be worth it 💋💋

Plus Size Blogger

🎶Never knew that I was starving till I tasted you…🎶


Yes it is. No matter shape, size, race, gender – you are allowed to love yourself!!! 

‘Never knew that I was starving till I tasted you’ this weeks blog title because I love this song, like really LOVE it! It’s a song about sex, I think, in some form. However me being me loves it as I relate it to cheese. My first love. I never know how starving I am until I eat cheese then I am gone. Pig out, not normal eating. 

Radom wee bit of info for you, I am sharing how even as my mind gets better at not making my weight the centre of my world, I still love food and I’m allowed to love food! 🧀
This is irony at its best as I started a 7 day slimfast trial today. This may confuse you as it doesn’t seem to fit in with my recent ‘body positive mantra.’ I tend to disagree. At the moment I feel uncomfortable about my weight as it’s restricting me in certain things so I 100% want to get some off.  This doesn’t mean I think everyone should diet/lose weight. It means I want to love my body at all sizes, respect myself enough not to hate it whatever journey I am on and also have no comment or opinion on the bodies of others.


Not everyone feels this way it would seem. This week I was subjected to being called a ‘fat whore’ and to add to the vile comment, gestures of pig noises and animated arms depicting how big this person believed I was. Surprisingly my gut reaction was laughter, I just shook my head and thought ‘what a disgusting comment to make about someone’ but as the day went on it began to eat away at me and my mind starting telling me people had been talking about me and looking at my size. My head was filled with paranoia that all I was seen as was a fat pig. 2 small words and a few animated actions and look at the impact. 

My mums response when I told her was ‘don’t worry you can always diet, this person has an ugly heart’ – not quite the response I was looking for bless her 💚

People can be really nasty. Some make throwaway comments not realising how the can hurt someone and others, like this say it to goad and get a reaction. 

I’ve now put it out of my head using my usual positive thoughts. At the end of the day you cannot change others opinions of you but what you can change is your reaction.

Day 1 of slimfast was fine. Latte shake for breakfast, snack bar, meal replacement bar for lunch, small pkt pretzels then dinner of chicken and peppers with rice. 

I know this is not a healthy way to live andisn’t a  lifestyle change. It’s a quick fix, a boost to get me started and I’m fine with that. Hopefully after 7 days I’ll have shifted a few lbs. 

I’ve signed up for another 10k and not started any training yet 🤦🏼‍♀️ I really need to up my game.  Nothing seems to be pushing me. I have been a bit shopping mad recently and after an order came from asos I told myself if nothing fitted I’d force myself out running. For the first time in history every item in the order fitted?!! It’s a sign I’m destined to never take up running again haha 🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏽‍♀️

It wouldn’t be a Fatty blog without sharing some of my purchases with you! This isn’t my usual look but I’m trying something different. Not yet bought the doc martins but they are next on my list 😊

Keep loving your boobless, chunky thighed, purple stretch marked, skinny ankled bodies as much as you can! 

Remember it’s ok to think you are hot as f4ck 🙋🏼❤️❤️

Love Fatty 💋💋

Plus Size Blogger

Independence, Fashion and being Happy :-)

If plus size clothing was the norm, would we still hate our bodies as much? Something I thought about this weekend. 

I went shopping with my mum and I was dreading it slightly as I know how much she hates her size and how trying to buy clothes adds to the distress. I hate seeing her so unhappy.

After some success we went to new look and headed straight to their plus size range.  I got one dress but the rest of the stock depressed me.  The same baggy long top in blue, purple, yellow, red and white.   Bardot tops that I could never wear as  a strapless bra on me is unthinkable and that was about it.  I am anywhere between a size 18 and a size 22 depending on what shop.  The lack of choice wasn’t great for my mind. Right away the hatred I had for myself was beginning to come to the surface and I hadn’t even looked in a mirror yet.

I was in the large flagship store and the ‘normal’ range they have in 6-18 is so beautiful it just baffles me why they don’t make the same clothes larger?  Anyway I wandered over to the bright dresses, skirts and tops and they had some in a size 18.  I bought a white short dress, midi lilac skirt and a cropped yellow top in size 18’s to try on at home

I had visions of me returning them the next day, however when I got home they fitted and I felt great.  Bright, summer, fashionable and so the type of style I love to wear.

I honestly felt fabulous.  I still had my problem tummy and my thighs didn’t suddenly look 3 sizes smaller, but that wasn’t what I was focused on.  I was just delighted I had clothes I loved that fitted.  I also got some amazing red and white checked sandles which just completed the day. 

I really struggle when there is a the lack of fashion available.  I have admitted in many posts I can be quite vain.  I love make up and clothes and feel this is a big part of me.  I like girly, feminine clothing and when I have to wear leggings, baggy tops and the same style of skater dress to every night out due to my size it affects my mood in a big way.  I don’t feel me – I feel like a different person.
I also love to wear jeans and heels but never find any jeans that fit me and after a meltdown in the river island changing room last year when a size 22 wouldn’t go by my knees I gave up!  That was until my friend told me about gap jeans.  I went online and picked the biggest size – size 35, thinking not a chance but they came and I loved them!  Fitted perfectly and I wear them all the time.  Again they don’t take 5 stones off me but they fit me comfortably and I feel good in them.

As a younger version of me I quite like designer clothing but again as I have got bigger they don’t cater for me.  Well most don’t, except the wee gem that is Ralph Lauren.  I wouldn’t say their style is one I relate to or love in the main but their wee polo shirts look great with well fitting jeans (see Gap 🙂 ) or shorts for holidays. Every little helps….. whoops that’s a different brand isn’t it 😜

My body confidence journey has really come along way and I work every day to be positive and not let how I fell about my shape affect me.  My mental health is more important to me at the moment than anything and by starting to remove the negativity I have about my body I am getting better. I need to work on this daily but I keep doing it.


The lack of plus size fashion, I believe, contributes massively to how I feel.  I appreciate for everyone this may not be the case but by looking deeper into what makes you happy and or sad, it can help to remove the focus from ‘I have a huge ass’ etc and channel your energy into shifting your mindset.

I get there is a fine line when delving into matters of the mind and what makes you happy as it can potentially bring thoughts and feelings to the surface you tried to hide or didn’t even know you had.  Fearne Cotton has just released a book called ‘happy’ which I haven’t read yet but have been told some of the content is quite dark in terms of her explaining her depression and how she eventually found her happiness.  

The one question she asks time and time again is ‘what makes you happy.’  This isn’t as easy as your first think.  2 years ago my answer would have been ‘being a size 10 will make me happy’ – now I know this is ridiculous and that there are so many other elements that make up my life rather than just my weight.  Thinking about this now and how it links to my feelings of my body, what makes me ultimately at my happiest is having a sense of  Independence and individuality.  I hate being governed my rules, peoples views and situations.  When I look at things that have upset me or I have struggled with in my life, one of these elements have been challenged or compromised in some way.

It may seem miles away from relating to plus size fashion but for me the link is there. Not being able to be myself, have individuality, being governed by what I can and cant wear really affects my mind.  It is easy to say well you can just change that by losing weight – why didn’t I think of that eh! 🙂

On a final note – one of my fav online shops have a massive 70% sale. I got the following at a steal! Dress was £65 to £17 and skirt was £45 to £9.99 😍😍

Www.chichiclothing.com/chi_chi/curve 

What makes you happy? Think about it….. 💋💋